i am dahee

the big TWO OH

so i’ve been twenty for just alittle over 7 minutes now and i am rather surprised with my rather smooth reaction/acceptance of how i am no longer a teen no more

i admit. i thought being 20 would be more eventful, losing my ‘teenage-ness’ i thought there’d be midnight deliveries, backyard fireworks and a secret visit from a friend or two just to rub in the fact that i’m old by bringing me a pic of when i was a baby. fanciful thoughts for a very fantasical mind haha

i think the one thing that i’ll carry with me as i grow older and older is that i’ll never stop being such a romantic and such a wishful person and i hope that to my dying days i’ll always hope and wish for things, even if they never come to pass. 

sitting here the only one awake in my house and possibly on my street, i kinda suddenly feel sad and think about how much i want to just be 17 or 18 again. and then i think about my beloved mama next door sleeping dreaming of her youth and the hardship she had to go through - hoping blindly that oneday what she’s going through would help secure a future for her children. and i gotta admit, getting pretty damn teary, especially when im writing her a letter as well atm

hmmmm this is quite quaint this twenty business. im twenty years old ey. and going to embark on one of the most important phases of my life in just 2 months and spend my 21st in japan away from all family and friends…

hmmm definitely wishing for my fantastical hopes and wishes to never leave me so that when i’m celebrating this day next year by myself in a land not all to well known to me, i can dream about how being 20 was not so bad because i atleast had family and friends with me